I had the honor and privilege to be part of the team that hosted Dr. John Gray (author of Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus) in Bahrain. This involvement provided me with a rare opportunity to interact with this thought leader and great speaker. In this article, I will share with you some of the world-class speaking skills John used throughout his insightful and entertaining talks.
Localization. John realizes it is important for speakers to use local supporting materials that include examples, statistics and stories to connect better with the audience. When we had lunch together, he asked us many questions and he was probing for deeper answers. When we talked, he gave us his undivided attention. This was clear when he used one of my stories I shared with him during lunch in his evening talk. In addition, he asked me if I could find him some data about divorce trends in Bahrain and its causes. Moreover, he asked if I could find him some Narrations and Verses on relationships from the Islamic literature. These resonated very well with the audience.
Dr. John Gray talking to us in search of local insights about Mars & Venus.
Connecting with the crowd. John used every opportunity to connect better with the audience. He went around the halls shaking hands and chatting with the attendees to establish a deeper bond with them. He also used the book signing breaks to interact with the audience by validating his points with them and looking for more insights about the local culture. I especially liked the fact that he moved around during meal times to connect and interact with the maximum number of delegates.
Dr. John Gray welcoming the audience to his first talk.
Dealing with the unexpected. John is world-class speaker who is always prepared for the unexpected. As per Murphy, if anything can go wrong, it will! John delivered three talks to three different audiences. In two of his talks, the mike did not work properly. He used these two opportunities effectively by making a funny remark about the sound system that made the audience laugh and immediately went on to illustrate an important point on communication failure between husbands and wives: Just like the mike, sometimes our communication with our partner does not work!
Body language at its best. John is an animated speaker. His hands gestures and his facial expressions complement his messages effectively. In addition, I am sure his body movements and gestures keep him energized throughout his talks. From the audience perspective, he comes across as a speaker who is dynamic and energetic. Think about it, would you prefer listening to a speaker who standing still as if he was pinned to the stage or a speaker who moves on the stage with purpose?
Vocal variety. Just like using effective body language, speaking with different tones and pitches help you in conveying the emotions of your stories’ characters. John used vocal variety effectively throughout his talks to bring his characters alive and make his stories more interesting to the audience. He conveyed many emotions like anger, dismay, happiness, sadness, joy and much more by just using his vocal variety. For example, instead of saying “they were angry”, he showed us how angry they were through his voice.
Superb Staging. John is a master when it comes to staging. He used the stage effectively to illustrate his points and stories. He moved with a purpose in all directions. The audience had a big laugh when he demonstrated how & why wives hide from their husbands and how & why husbands hide from their wives. He also used the stage to demonstrate the difference behavior between men and women when it comes shopping! My ultimate magical staging moment was when he placed an imaginary giant brain on the stage to illustrate the thinking patterns of men and women. I loved it and I will never forget it!
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O-QbRN6ybHM[/youtube]Humor all the way. If you have heard me speak on humor, chances are you have heard me saying: When it comes to humor, weave it, don’t force it! John did just that throughout his three talks. He brilliantly weaved humor in his stories and his vocal variety and facial expressions helped a lot. The audience was enjoying his talks thoroughly. This was evident at the end of his three talks. The audience remained in the halls until the very end of his talks to be inspired and to be entertained.
Powerful props. John has used different props masterfully during his talks. His two main props were a stool and roses placed in a crystal and transparent vase. But that wasn’t it. He used a bottle of water and a glass to demonstrate an important point relating to the thinking patterns of men and women when it comes to efficiency and romance as well as the nature of men and women when it comes to tenderness and toughness. His illustrations made the points clearer and more vivid in the minds of the audience.
Dr. John Gray borrowed props to illustrate the difference between Mars and Venus using the size of their purses.
No slides. Yes, no slides period. John talks do not require slides as visual aids. He uses the stage and props effectively to illustrate his points through stories and anecdotes. By doing this not only he establishes more credibility with the audience about his expertise about his subject matter but also relieves himself from potential technology failures and frustrations.
Building excitement. As an experienced speaker, John knows how to build the energy of the audience through his personal stories, superb staging and audience involvement. He involved the audience in his talks by borrowing props from them, having them respond to his questions and completing different sentences. He carefully built the energy and excitement of the audience in a gradual manner until he reached his ultimate excitement building activity. You can watch this in the video clip below.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LTgAXhUqnj0[/youtube]I could go on and on writing about John Gray’s world-class speaking skills. However, I truly believe that “seeing is believing.” Accordingly, I encourage you to visit John’s website to see him in action and learn from him; take notes and apply what you learn.
I am sure you can speak the “John Gray” way!